Yes, this is Home. by Priya
Eight years ago I got the worse news of my life. I was six years old, with a big personality, and a bad attitude. My parents told me we were moving, and to North Carolina of all places! My first instinct was to scream, and so I did. Then I got in trouble so I cried. I was a New Jersey girl who loved the crazy, busy
noise of a cramped city, and couldn't stand the quiet for a second! I could NOT move to a quiet, peaceful, country town! There was no way. Little did I know
that my tantrums and screams were of no use at all. My parents were not going to budge.
When I told my friends at school that I was moving to North Carolina they were devastated. I mean, I'd known these people for six years of my precious life, and now we were being ripped apart and we would never be able to see each other ever again (I was a pretty dramatic child)! After crying out rivers for two minutes, they told me the things they'd known or heard about North Carolina. How people were stuck up. That it was so boring, no one was nice, too many stinky farms, etc. etc. I was so scared. Terrified, and blown out of my mind is a better description. There were a million things running through my head! I didn't want to leave all my friends and family behind. My aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents, we all lived in the same neighborhood. How was I going to get used to not seeing them every day? What about friends? Am I going to have to start all over? What if I couldn't fit in? But the one question that scared me the most, and frightened me to even think about, was what if I don't belong?
The life I'd always known was the one I wanted. It was perfect for me, and everyone else! My parents both had a high salary and I went to a great private school. I didn't understand why they wanted to move when everything was already so perfect. So I asked them. I may have been six years old, but I deserved to know. They told me they bought a convenience store in North Carolina so we could spend more time as a family. Even though they both had high salaries, they said it wasn't worth having to drop my brother and I off in daycare and only getting time as a family on Sunday mornings. They told me that when we moved and settled in, we would finally be able to spend more time together as a family. And that I wouldn't have to go to daycare anymore. I decided to rethink the entire thing. I began to see it in a little brighter way, but I was still upset. It didn't matter though, because we were now on the NJ turnpike, nine more hours away till arriving to my worst nightmare, and there was absolutely nothing I could do to stop it.
I was asleep most of the ride, but my mom woke me up when we crossed the state line. I started to notice that there definitely was a lot more greenery and it was pretty quiet. Not so bad though. Maybe change wasn't so bad after all? I still wasn't sure. So we stopped for gas at the first gas station we saw. I got off and went to use the bathroom and freshen up, with a much more positive outlook on things. Then came little miss grumpy (that was the name I decided to
give her after our little “encounter”). While waiting for my mom, I stood outside the bathroom and met this other little girl about my age. After eight hours of talking to no one but myself, my parents, and my six month old brother who couldn't even talk yet, I decided to try to spark up a conversation with someone that was my age. “Hi!” was what I said. Only “Hi”. How did she reply you ask? Oh wait, I remember! She didn't. She looked at me and made a noise. “Hmph”
was what I got, and then she walked away. I was pretty upset. And by upset, I really mean angry. Everyone was right! People in North Carolina really were
stuck up! When my mom came out, I told her my story in tears and the fit of rage about moving came back. I said some things I shouldn't have and the last hour or so of the ride, went by in silence.
We arranged everything to where when we arrived at the apartment, everything would already be set up. All the furniture and bedroom equipment was there and ready to be used. This was supposed to be a good thing, because I was glad to be able to rest after such a long ride, but that was until I got there. I did not at all like our apartment. My bedroom was two times smaller than my old one and there were only three! I also didn’t get to pick my room, which is what was supposed to happen! So far my experience in Craven County and North Carolina, had NOT been a good one. Unfortunately, it dawned upon me that I was going to have to live here. FOREVER. In my head I kept think and repeating, “I hate North Carolina and I’m never going to survive here, and I’m gonna have to run away and get a job, and I’ll have to live someplace in a box with no one but myself to talk to and no one will find me and I’m gonna have to die in that box, and OMGOMGOMG! It was definitely going to take a lot of effort to get used to this place, cause I certainly did not want to live in a box.
The next morning my mom was going to take me to see our new store, and get me enrolled into a new school. Our new store was actually pretty nice. I mean, what kind of six year old could possibly not like a place with loads and loads of candy and chips and drinks all for free?! It was heaven. My mood brightened, and once again, I started to like the place a little better. That was until we got to Ruth's Chapel Private School. There were UNIFORMS. Oh, my nightmare just got a whole lot worse. We weren't allowed to wear pants or anything that didn't have the Ruth's Chapel logo on it. Also, I would be put in a class with the same people every year. And then I found out that Craven County was the only place within miles to have started uniforms. Once again, I hated the place. Except now, Craven County was the focus of my hatred, North Carolina and New Bern were all just the genre that this place fell under.
So far my emotions associated with Craven County had been like a roller coaster. Only, the good feelings were short lived and the bitterness seemed to come a lot more often. I didn't start school until August and July had just started. I had a loooong way to go. On the weekdays I went to the store with my parents and then we all came home in the afternoons to spend time together. Some days we went out to eat and sometimes we went to see some of my dad's friends out of town. Then came the weekend which is what I'd been waiting for, because my mom and dad told me they had a special surprise for me. They took me to a roller rink, and I discovered that this place wasn't as boring as it seemed! There, I made my very first friend. Her name was Maybell. She was really nice, and told me a lot about the County. How the king and queen once used to live here, and how it was the birthplace of Pepsi (my favorite drink) and much more! I also discovered that she lived in the same neighborhood as me. We started to hang out a lot more and she introduced me to more people whom I soon became friends with.
Several weeks went by, and my opinion on the people of Craven County changed a lot. I had lots of friends and everywhere we went people welcomed us to the homely county. After the first week, people were bringing us cakes and treats welcoming us to the neighborhood and my family got to know more people which came in handy with many things in the future. However, I still had that dwindling feeling that this place was not meant for me, and that I did not belong. I missed my cousins back home so much more than I thought I would, and that made me feel left out. Everyone else was still there probably laughing and having a good time like before, and here I was. Alone, with none of my cousins and none of my aunts and uncles. I tried to tell myself that it was only a matter of time, but that didn’t change the feeling way inside me. I wasn’t from here, and therefore I didn’t belong here.
On Sunday, we went to the Neuse River park. Mom and dad had already warned me by saying that there weren't any slides or too many playground equipment. So my heart wasn't really set to go. Upon reaching there, I saw that there were swings so that was the first place I went. Then we went for a walk. Never before had I seen a river or lake up close, or anything else of the sort besides small puddles of water filled with yuck and mud. I was speechless. Absolutely astounded by what lay before me. It was beyond beautiful, and words couldn't describe how the sight in front of my eyes made me feel. All of a sudden, everything seemed to become a whole lot brighter. Maybe Craven County wasn't as bad as I thought? Maybe I should give it another chance? Maybe this feeling of peace and serenity was one that I liked? Maybe I did belong here? Hmm questions, questions, questions.....
A week later I went to Bojangles for the very first time (they didn't have a Bojangles in New Jersey) and once again I was speechless! I'd never even had
fried chicken or heard of sweet tea before! Although I wasn't that big of a fan for sweet tea or fried chicken, the experience I had there changed my
opinion on Craven County majorly. As we were eating, I noticed a very old couple sitting across from us. Both were eating when suddenly I noticed that the man was very uncomfortable. He stood up and it became obvious that he was choking. I screamed for help and stood up looking around to see if there was anyone nearby to help. My dad had gone outside to make a phone call and my mom was in the bathroom. It was just my brother and I, and neither one of us could save a choking man! The old lady began to scream and shout, not at all knowing what to do! I was so scared all I could think of was to scream and cry! All of the employees in the Bojangles were screaming too! No one was moving to save the man! Then about ten seconds later, all at once, everyone was moving towards him and one of the men from the crowd, went up to him, and started to perform the procedure. I was familiar with this because I had seen it on TV before, but I'd never found it that serious. In the next few hectic seconds, the man saved him. After everything was settled and the ambulance had left (someone called 911), the old man went to thank the man who saved his life. The man smiled and the two carried on a conversation like nothing had ever happened! Afterward, the people in the restaurant, went outside and followed the old man making sure he got in safely and that he didn't need anything else. The old man was offering the man a BLANK CHECK! He told him to fill in any amount he wished, and to not worry at all about it. The man who saved him was probably in his mid-20s. He smiled and kindly told him that he couldn't accept the money. I remember his exact words, because that one event, formed my opinion permanently. He said, “Sir, I did not save your life for the satisfaction that I would receive something in return. The fact that I was able to save someone's life is of dear importance to me in and of itself. Thanks, but no thanks.” He smiled and then left. I was beyond amazed. Who wouldn't accept a blank check? Especially someone in his mid-20's with an entire future ahead of him! He could have set his whole life in one minute and not have to worry about getting a job or anything! Instead, he felt happy and proud for what he did. I, definitely would have taken up that reward.
After that incident, I started to notice these qualities in other people too. Everyone was very friendly with one another, and never, ever, EVER, in my own personal experience in this county have I ever heard anyone blow the horn at another car. When I lived in New Jersey, there was never a minute that went by where I didn't hear a car horn. It didn't bother me then, but when I go to visit now, it drives me insane! Don’t get me wrong, I still like the place and I visit there every year but now, I’ve found a place much more fit for me. I've grown to where I've fallen in love with both North Carolina and Craven County. There's not anywhere else I would want to live. I realized that the problem wasn't the state or county, but it was ME. I was the problem. Because I'd had such a negative
attitude on moving, it made me automatically dislike everything else about the place, and I wasn’t willing to accept the good parts or admit that maybe I did
like it here. After that experience, I started to see a brighter side on Craven County. Once my attitude was positive, I realized just how much I loved the
traits of this county. The peacefulness, the homely feeling, the fact that you're able to say hi to anyone and everyone you see, are all things that I actually enjoy. I'm glad that I moved here. Despite any other problems that have and will occur, I would never want to live anywhere else. The beauty and hospitality of the place won me over. This was home, I belonged, and no one could tell me otherwise.
- - - -
[ Author note goes here. ]
noise of a cramped city, and couldn't stand the quiet for a second! I could NOT move to a quiet, peaceful, country town! There was no way. Little did I know
that my tantrums and screams were of no use at all. My parents were not going to budge.
When I told my friends at school that I was moving to North Carolina they were devastated. I mean, I'd known these people for six years of my precious life, and now we were being ripped apart and we would never be able to see each other ever again (I was a pretty dramatic child)! After crying out rivers for two minutes, they told me the things they'd known or heard about North Carolina. How people were stuck up. That it was so boring, no one was nice, too many stinky farms, etc. etc. I was so scared. Terrified, and blown out of my mind is a better description. There were a million things running through my head! I didn't want to leave all my friends and family behind. My aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents, we all lived in the same neighborhood. How was I going to get used to not seeing them every day? What about friends? Am I going to have to start all over? What if I couldn't fit in? But the one question that scared me the most, and frightened me to even think about, was what if I don't belong?
The life I'd always known was the one I wanted. It was perfect for me, and everyone else! My parents both had a high salary and I went to a great private school. I didn't understand why they wanted to move when everything was already so perfect. So I asked them. I may have been six years old, but I deserved to know. They told me they bought a convenience store in North Carolina so we could spend more time as a family. Even though they both had high salaries, they said it wasn't worth having to drop my brother and I off in daycare and only getting time as a family on Sunday mornings. They told me that when we moved and settled in, we would finally be able to spend more time together as a family. And that I wouldn't have to go to daycare anymore. I decided to rethink the entire thing. I began to see it in a little brighter way, but I was still upset. It didn't matter though, because we were now on the NJ turnpike, nine more hours away till arriving to my worst nightmare, and there was absolutely nothing I could do to stop it.
I was asleep most of the ride, but my mom woke me up when we crossed the state line. I started to notice that there definitely was a lot more greenery and it was pretty quiet. Not so bad though. Maybe change wasn't so bad after all? I still wasn't sure. So we stopped for gas at the first gas station we saw. I got off and went to use the bathroom and freshen up, with a much more positive outlook on things. Then came little miss grumpy (that was the name I decided to
give her after our little “encounter”). While waiting for my mom, I stood outside the bathroom and met this other little girl about my age. After eight hours of talking to no one but myself, my parents, and my six month old brother who couldn't even talk yet, I decided to try to spark up a conversation with someone that was my age. “Hi!” was what I said. Only “Hi”. How did she reply you ask? Oh wait, I remember! She didn't. She looked at me and made a noise. “Hmph”
was what I got, and then she walked away. I was pretty upset. And by upset, I really mean angry. Everyone was right! People in North Carolina really were
stuck up! When my mom came out, I told her my story in tears and the fit of rage about moving came back. I said some things I shouldn't have and the last hour or so of the ride, went by in silence.
We arranged everything to where when we arrived at the apartment, everything would already be set up. All the furniture and bedroom equipment was there and ready to be used. This was supposed to be a good thing, because I was glad to be able to rest after such a long ride, but that was until I got there. I did not at all like our apartment. My bedroom was two times smaller than my old one and there were only three! I also didn’t get to pick my room, which is what was supposed to happen! So far my experience in Craven County and North Carolina, had NOT been a good one. Unfortunately, it dawned upon me that I was going to have to live here. FOREVER. In my head I kept think and repeating, “I hate North Carolina and I’m never going to survive here, and I’m gonna have to run away and get a job, and I’ll have to live someplace in a box with no one but myself to talk to and no one will find me and I’m gonna have to die in that box, and OMGOMGOMG! It was definitely going to take a lot of effort to get used to this place, cause I certainly did not want to live in a box.
The next morning my mom was going to take me to see our new store, and get me enrolled into a new school. Our new store was actually pretty nice. I mean, what kind of six year old could possibly not like a place with loads and loads of candy and chips and drinks all for free?! It was heaven. My mood brightened, and once again, I started to like the place a little better. That was until we got to Ruth's Chapel Private School. There were UNIFORMS. Oh, my nightmare just got a whole lot worse. We weren't allowed to wear pants or anything that didn't have the Ruth's Chapel logo on it. Also, I would be put in a class with the same people every year. And then I found out that Craven County was the only place within miles to have started uniforms. Once again, I hated the place. Except now, Craven County was the focus of my hatred, North Carolina and New Bern were all just the genre that this place fell under.
So far my emotions associated with Craven County had been like a roller coaster. Only, the good feelings were short lived and the bitterness seemed to come a lot more often. I didn't start school until August and July had just started. I had a loooong way to go. On the weekdays I went to the store with my parents and then we all came home in the afternoons to spend time together. Some days we went out to eat and sometimes we went to see some of my dad's friends out of town. Then came the weekend which is what I'd been waiting for, because my mom and dad told me they had a special surprise for me. They took me to a roller rink, and I discovered that this place wasn't as boring as it seemed! There, I made my very first friend. Her name was Maybell. She was really nice, and told me a lot about the County. How the king and queen once used to live here, and how it was the birthplace of Pepsi (my favorite drink) and much more! I also discovered that she lived in the same neighborhood as me. We started to hang out a lot more and she introduced me to more people whom I soon became friends with.
Several weeks went by, and my opinion on the people of Craven County changed a lot. I had lots of friends and everywhere we went people welcomed us to the homely county. After the first week, people were bringing us cakes and treats welcoming us to the neighborhood and my family got to know more people which came in handy with many things in the future. However, I still had that dwindling feeling that this place was not meant for me, and that I did not belong. I missed my cousins back home so much more than I thought I would, and that made me feel left out. Everyone else was still there probably laughing and having a good time like before, and here I was. Alone, with none of my cousins and none of my aunts and uncles. I tried to tell myself that it was only a matter of time, but that didn’t change the feeling way inside me. I wasn’t from here, and therefore I didn’t belong here.
On Sunday, we went to the Neuse River park. Mom and dad had already warned me by saying that there weren't any slides or too many playground equipment. So my heart wasn't really set to go. Upon reaching there, I saw that there were swings so that was the first place I went. Then we went for a walk. Never before had I seen a river or lake up close, or anything else of the sort besides small puddles of water filled with yuck and mud. I was speechless. Absolutely astounded by what lay before me. It was beyond beautiful, and words couldn't describe how the sight in front of my eyes made me feel. All of a sudden, everything seemed to become a whole lot brighter. Maybe Craven County wasn't as bad as I thought? Maybe I should give it another chance? Maybe this feeling of peace and serenity was one that I liked? Maybe I did belong here? Hmm questions, questions, questions.....
A week later I went to Bojangles for the very first time (they didn't have a Bojangles in New Jersey) and once again I was speechless! I'd never even had
fried chicken or heard of sweet tea before! Although I wasn't that big of a fan for sweet tea or fried chicken, the experience I had there changed my
opinion on Craven County majorly. As we were eating, I noticed a very old couple sitting across from us. Both were eating when suddenly I noticed that the man was very uncomfortable. He stood up and it became obvious that he was choking. I screamed for help and stood up looking around to see if there was anyone nearby to help. My dad had gone outside to make a phone call and my mom was in the bathroom. It was just my brother and I, and neither one of us could save a choking man! The old lady began to scream and shout, not at all knowing what to do! I was so scared all I could think of was to scream and cry! All of the employees in the Bojangles were screaming too! No one was moving to save the man! Then about ten seconds later, all at once, everyone was moving towards him and one of the men from the crowd, went up to him, and started to perform the procedure. I was familiar with this because I had seen it on TV before, but I'd never found it that serious. In the next few hectic seconds, the man saved him. After everything was settled and the ambulance had left (someone called 911), the old man went to thank the man who saved his life. The man smiled and the two carried on a conversation like nothing had ever happened! Afterward, the people in the restaurant, went outside and followed the old man making sure he got in safely and that he didn't need anything else. The old man was offering the man a BLANK CHECK! He told him to fill in any amount he wished, and to not worry at all about it. The man who saved him was probably in his mid-20s. He smiled and kindly told him that he couldn't accept the money. I remember his exact words, because that one event, formed my opinion permanently. He said, “Sir, I did not save your life for the satisfaction that I would receive something in return. The fact that I was able to save someone's life is of dear importance to me in and of itself. Thanks, but no thanks.” He smiled and then left. I was beyond amazed. Who wouldn't accept a blank check? Especially someone in his mid-20's with an entire future ahead of him! He could have set his whole life in one minute and not have to worry about getting a job or anything! Instead, he felt happy and proud for what he did. I, definitely would have taken up that reward.
After that incident, I started to notice these qualities in other people too. Everyone was very friendly with one another, and never, ever, EVER, in my own personal experience in this county have I ever heard anyone blow the horn at another car. When I lived in New Jersey, there was never a minute that went by where I didn't hear a car horn. It didn't bother me then, but when I go to visit now, it drives me insane! Don’t get me wrong, I still like the place and I visit there every year but now, I’ve found a place much more fit for me. I've grown to where I've fallen in love with both North Carolina and Craven County. There's not anywhere else I would want to live. I realized that the problem wasn't the state or county, but it was ME. I was the problem. Because I'd had such a negative
attitude on moving, it made me automatically dislike everything else about the place, and I wasn’t willing to accept the good parts or admit that maybe I did
like it here. After that experience, I started to see a brighter side on Craven County. Once my attitude was positive, I realized just how much I loved the
traits of this county. The peacefulness, the homely feeling, the fact that you're able to say hi to anyone and everyone you see, are all things that I actually enjoy. I'm glad that I moved here. Despite any other problems that have and will occur, I would never want to live anywhere else. The beauty and hospitality of the place won me over. This was home, I belonged, and no one could tell me otherwise.
- - - -
[ Author note goes here. ]